my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
