i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize