So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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