insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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