i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
