ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
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And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
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Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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