the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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