Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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