You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Randomize
