oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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