We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
