Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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