Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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