Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
