Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
