mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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