Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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