found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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