I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
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Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
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New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I supernannyed him into submission
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize