My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
