so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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