love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
So vagazzling was a success
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
