OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
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Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
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On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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