So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
