At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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