I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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