At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
