I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize