Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
