I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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