i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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