i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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