how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
