Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
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The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
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He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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