If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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