Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
is wine microwaveable?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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