Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize