I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize
