no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Randomize
