and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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