shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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