I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
A+ Viking dick
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