Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cock deserves a montage
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
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