Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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