What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
