I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Come on in and take your pants off
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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