I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize