I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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