chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
