You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
